More Cards Against Humanity Card List

Speaking of recently published Cards Against Humanity expansions, more Cards Against Humanity is an important one. Published in August 2024 of this year, this shiny, mesmerizing box is a good mix of the best cards from the (Red), (Blue), and (Green) boxes, plus, 50 new cards. The whole deck of 600 cards is written in the fabulous list in the following. 

Ps. In ( ) you will find where each card comes from: the Red, Blue, Green Box, or if it’s brand new. 

More Cards Against Humanity Black Cards List

1. ______ is back! Only at McDonald’s. (Red)
2. ______ will never be the same after ______. (Blue)
3. ______. Awesome in theory, kind of a mess in practice. (Red)
4. 2 AM in the city that never sleeps. The door swings open and she walks in, legs up to here. Something in her eyes tells me she’s looking for ______. (Blue)
5. A remarkable new study has shown that chimps have evolved their own primitive version of ______. (Red)
6. Adventure. Romance. ______. From Paramount Pictures, “______.” (Blue)
7. After months of practice with ______, I think I’m finally ready for ______. (Red)
8. And I would have gotten away with it, too, if it hadn’t been for ______! (Red)
9. Armani suit: $1,000. Dinner for two at that swanky restaurant: $300. The look on her face when you surprise her with ______: priceless. (Blue)
10. Art isn’t just a painting in a stuffy museum. Art is alive. Art is ______. (Green)
11. Awww shit! ______ in da house! (Green)
12. Awww, sick! I just saw this skater do a 720 kickflip into ______! (Red)
13. Bay Area tech bros are paying thousands of dollars just to experience ______. (New)
14. Best you go back where you came from, now. We don’t take too kindly to ______ in these parts. (Green)
15. Bro, she’s so into me. She sent me a pic of her ______. (New)
16. Call the law offices of Goldstein & Goldstein, because no one should have to tolerate ______ in the workplace. (Red)
17. Charades was ruined for me forever when my mom had to act out ______. (Red)
18. CNN breaking news! Scientists discover ______. (Green)
19. Come to Dubai, where you can relax in our world-famous spas, experience the nightlife, or simply enjoy ______ by the poolside. (Blue)
20. Coming soon to Netflix! One cop plays by the book. The other’s only interested in one thing: ______. (New)
21. Congratulations! You have been selected for our summer internship program. While we are unable to offer a salary, we can offer you ______. (Green)
22. Dammit, Gary. You can’t just solve every problem with ______. (Blue)
23. Do not fuck with me! I am literally ______ right now. (Blue)
24. Doctor, you’ve gone too far! The human body wasn’t meant to withstand that amount of ______! (Red)
25. Don’t worry, kid. It gets better. I’ve been living with ______ for 20 years. (Blue)
26. Errbody in the club ______. (Green)
27. Every step towards ______ gets me a little bit closer to ______. (Blue)
28. Everybody join hands and close your eyes. Do you sense that? That’s the presence of ______ in this room. (Blue)
29. Father O’Connor, if God is all-good and all-powerful, why does he allow ______? (New)
30. Feeling so grateful! #amazing #mylife #______. (Green)
31. Girls just wanna have ______. (Green)
32. Google Calendar alert: ______ in 10 minutes. (Green)
33. Having the worst day EVER. #______ (Blue)
34. Here at the Academy for Gifted Children, we allow students to explore ______ at their own pace. (Blue)
35. Hey baby, come back to my place and I’ll show you ______. (Red)
36. Hi MTV! My name is Kendra, I live in Malibu, I’m into ______, and I love to have a good time. (Blue)
37. Hi, this is Jim from accounting. We noticed a $1,200 charge labeled “______.” Can you explain? (Blue)
38. Honey, I have a new role-play I want to try tonight! You can be ______, and I’ll be ______. (Blue)
39. How am I compensating for my tiny penis? (Blue)
40. I am become ______, destroyer of ______! (Blue)
41. I don’t believe in God. I believe in ______. (Green)
42. I have a strict policy. First date, dinner. Second date, kiss. Third date, ______. (Blue)
43. I just took a DNA test. Turns out I’m 100% ______. (Green)
44. I learned the hard way that you can’t cheer up a grieving friend with ______. (Red)
45. I love being a mom. But it’s tough when my kids come home filthy from ______. That’s why there’s Tide®. (Red)
46. I love my life! I’m young, hot, and full of ______. (New)
47. I may not be much to look at, but I fuck like ______. (Green)
48. I tell you, it was a non-stop fuckfest. When it was over, my asshole looked like ______. (Green)
49. I work my ass off all day for this family, and this is what I come home to? ______!? (Blue)
50. I’ll take the BBQ bacon burger with friend egg and fuck it how about ______. (Green)
51. I’m Miss Tennessee, and if I could make the world better by changing one thing, I would get rid of ______. (Blue)
52. I’m sorry, honey. I’m just not in the mood for ______ tonight. (New)
53. I’m sorry, Mrs. Chen, but there was nothing we could do. At 4:15 this morning, your son succumbed to ______. (Blue)
54. I’m sorry, sir, but your insurance plan doesn’t cover injuries caused by ______. (Green)
55. I’ve got rhythm, I’ve got music, I’ve got ______. Who could ask for anything more? (Green)
56. I’ve had a horrible vision, father. I saw mountains crumbling, stars falling from the sky. I saw ______. (Green)
57. If you can’t handle ______, you’d better stay away from ______. (Blue)
58. If you had to describe me, the Card Czar, using only one of the cards in your hand, which one would it be? (Blue)
59. In his newest and most difficult stunt, David Blaine must escape from ______. (Red)
60. In Irish culture, mourners express their grief through a traditional practice of ______. (Red)
61. In return for my soul, the Devil promised me ______, but all I got was ______. (Blue)
62. In the 1950s, psychologists prescribed ______ as a cure for homosexually. (Green)
63. In the seventh circle of Hell, sinners must endure ______ for all eternity. (Red)
64. It lurks in the night. It hungers for flesh. This summer, no one is safe from ______. (Blue)
65. James is a lonely boy. But when he discovers a secret door in his attic, he meets a magical new friend: ______. (Blue)
66. John Wick is a man of focus, commitment. I once saw him kill three men… with ______. (New)
67. Life’s pretty tough in the fast lane. That’s why I never leave the house without ______. (Blue)
68. Listen Gary, I like you. But if you want that corner office, you’re going to have to show me ______. (Blue)
69. Listen, son. If you want to get involved with ______, I won’t stop you. Just steer clear of ______. (Red)
70. Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and ______. (Red)
71. LSD + ______ = really bad time. (Green)
72. Mama gets what Mama wants, and Mama wants ______. (Blue)
73. “Mom’s to-do list:* Buy groceries* Clean up ______* Soccer practice” (Green)
74. Money can’t buy me love, but it can buy me ______. (Red)
75. Most Americans would not vote for a candidate who is openly ______. (Green)
76. My grandfather worked his way up from nothing. When he came to this country, all he had was the shoes on his feet and ______. (Blue)
77. My gym teacher got fi(Red) for adding ______ to the obstacle course. (Red)
78. My mom freaked out when she looked at my browser history and found ______.com/______. (Red)
79. My plan for world domination begins with ______. (Red)
80. Next time on Dr. Phil: How to talk to your child about ______. (Red)
81. No, no, no, no, no, no, NO! I will NOT let ______ ruin this wedding. (Green)
82. Oh man, the edibles must have kicked in because I’m absolutely mesmerized by ______. (New)
83. Oh my god, Mom, it’s so unfair! Why am I the only kid at school who has to deal with ______? (New)
84. Only two things in life are certain: death and ______. (Red)
85. Ooo, daddy like ______. (Green)
86. Our first date was going horribly until we discove(Red) our sha(Red) interest in ______. (New)
87. Patient presents with ______. Likely a result of ______. (Blue)
88. Poor Brandon, still living in his parent’s basement. I heard he never got over ______. (Green)
89. Puberty is a time of change. You might notice hair growing in new places. You might develop an interest in ______. This is normal. (Blue)
90. Run, run, as fast as you can! You can’t catch me, I’m ______! (Green)
91. Science will never explain ______. (Red)
92. She’s a lady in the streets, ______ in the sheets. (Green)
93. She’s just one of the guys, you know? She likes beer, and football, and ______. (Green)
94. She’s up all night for good fun. I’m up all night for ______. (Blue)
95. Son, quit messin’ with ______ or folks will think you’re queer. (New)
96. Son, take it from someone who’s been around the block a few times. Nothin’ puts her in the mood like ______. (Green)
97. The Japanese have developed a smaller, more efficient version of ______. (Blue)
98. The six things I could never do without: oxygen, facebook, chocolate, netflix, friends, and ______ LOL! (Blue)
99. “The top Google auto-complete results for Taylor Swift”: Taylor Swift age. Taylor Swift net worth. Taylor Swift ______.” (New)
100. Then the princess kissed the frog, and all of a sudden the frog was ______! (Green)
101. There is no God. It’s just ______ and then you die. (Green)
102. This Friday at the Liquid Lounge, it’s ______ Night! Ladies drink free. (Green)
103. This is AMURICA. If you don’t WORK HARD, you don’t succeed. I don’t care if you’re black, white, purple, or ______. (Blue)
104. Today’s #1 Tip: Spice up your sex life by bringing ______ into the bedroom! (Red)
105. Tonight on 20/20: What you don’t know about ______ could kill you. (Red)
106. Tonight we will have sex. And afterwards, If you’d like, a little bit of ______. (Blue)
107. Turns out that ______-Man was neither the hero we needed nor wanted. (Red)
108. We never did find ______, but along the way we sure learned a lot about ______. (Blue)
109. Welcome to Señor Frog’s! Would you like to try our signature cocktail, “______ on the Beach”? (Red)
110. Well what do you have to say for yourself, Casey? This is the third time you’ve been sent to the principal’s office for ______. (Blue)
111. Well, shit. My eyes ain’t so good, but I’ll eat my own boot if that ain’t ______! (Green)
112. Wes Anderson’s new film tells the story of a precocious child coming to terms with ______. (Blue)
113. What are all those whales singing about? (Green)
114. What makes Grandpa feel young again? (New)
115. What sucks balls? (Green)
116. What totally destroyed my asshole? (Green)
117. What turned me into a Republican? (Green)
118. What will end racism once and for all? (Green)
119. What’s about to take dance floor to the next level? (Green)
120. What’s fun until it gets weird? (Blue)
121. What’s making things awkward in the sauna? (Blue)
122. What’s the gayest? (Green)
123. What’s the most problematic? (Green)
124. When all else fails, I can always masturbate to ______. (Red)
125. When the dog bites / When the bee stings / When I’m feeling sad / I simply remember ______ / And then I don’t feel so bad. (Red)
126. Why am I laughing and crying and taking off my clothes? (Green)
127. Why won’t you make love to me anymore? Is it ______? (Blue)
128. With a one-time gift of just $10, you can save this child from ______. (Green)
129. Y’all ready to get this thing started? I’m Nick Cannon, and this is America’s Got ______. (Blue)
130. Yo’ mama so fat she ______! (Blue)
131. You are not alone. Millions of Americans struggle with ______ every day. (Blue)
132. You guys, I saw this crazy movie last night. It opens on ______, and then there’s some stuff about ______, and then it ends with ______. (Blue)
133. You know who else liked ______? Hitler. (Green)
134. You won’t believe what’s in my pussy. It’s ______. (Green)
135. Your persistence is admirable, my dear Prince. But you cannot win my heart with ______ alone. (Red)

If this expansion isn’t enough, we at Edition Cards have lots more CAH packs for you to check out! 

More Cards Against Humanity White Cards List

1. $8.27. (New)
2. 10 football players with erections barrelling towards you at full speed. (Green)
3. 14,000 unread emails. (New)
4. A big ol’ plate of fettuccine alf(Red)o. (Green)
5. A bigger, blacker dick. (Red)
6. A Black friend. (Green)
7. A Black-owned and operated business. (Red)
8. A bomb that detonates if you stop masturbating. (New)
9. A boo-boo. (Red)
10. A bunch of idiots playing a card game instead of interacting like normal humans. (Blue)
11. A cold and indifferent universe. (Green)
12. A commitment to hiring diverse talent. (Blue)
13. A complicated relationship with food. (Red)
14. A constant need for validation. (Blue)
15. A crazy little thing called love. (Blue)
16. A creature made of penises that must constantly arouse itself to survive. (Green)
17. A creepy child singing a nursery rhyme. (Green)
18. A dance move that’s just sex. (Blue)
19. A dildo signed by Jimmy Carter. (Green)
20. A dolphin that learns to talk and becomes the Dean of Harvard Law School. (Green)
21. A duffel bag full of lizards. (Green)
22. A face full of horse cum. (Blue)
23. A fart. (Blue)
24. A fortuitous turnip harvest. (Red)
25. A genetic p(Red)isposition for alcoholism. (Green)
26. A global cabal of pedophile billionaires. (Blue)
27. A groundbreaking new masturbation technique. (Green)
28. A hopeless amount of spiders. (Blue)
29. A horse with no legs. (Blue)
30. A hug. (Green)
31. A Japanese toaster you can fuck. (Red)
32. A lil’ stupid ass bitch. (Blue)
33. A man in a suit with perfect hair who tells you beautiful lies. (Green)
34. A man with the head of a goat and the body of a goat. (Green)
35. A massive collection of child pornography. (Green)
36. A medium horchata. (Green)
37. A metaphor for something. (New)
38. A phantasmagoria of anal delights. (Red)
39. A piñata full of scorpions. (Red)
40. A pinky up the butt. (New)
41. A pizza guy who fucked up. (Blue)
42. A PowerPoint presentation. (Red)
43. A real sad guy. (Red)
44. A self-microwaving burrito. (Blue)
45. A sofa that says “I have style, but I like to be comfortable.” (Red)
46. A special kind of yogurt called “cum.” (Red)
47. A strong horse and enough rations for thirty days. (Green)
48. A superspreader event. (New)
49. A surprising amount of hair. (Red)
50. A terrified fat child who won’t come out of the bushes. (Green)
51. A tiny fireman who puts out tiny fires. (Green)
52. A turd. (Blue)
53. A vagina that leads to another dimension. (Red)
54. A website dedicated entirely to pornography. (New)
55. A weird guy who says weird stuff and weirds me out. (Green)
56. A whole lotta woman. (Blue)
57. A whole new kind of porn. (Blue)
58. A woman. (Blue)
59. A woman’s perspective. (Green)
60. A woman’s right to choose. (Green)
61. A zero-risk way to make $5,000 from home. (New)
62. Aborting the shit out of a fetus. (Green)
63. Acknowledging that we stand on the unceded lands of Indigenous peoples. (Blue)
64. Africa. (Blue)
65. Albert Einstein but if he had huge muscles and a rhinoceros cock. (Green)
66. All my friends dying. (Red)
67. All the single ladies. (Blue)
68. American cultural hegemony. (New)
69. An active shooter. (Red)
70. An incurable homosexual. (Green)
71. An oppressed people with a vibrant culture. (Blue)
72. An unforgettable quinceañera. (Blue)
73. An unhinged Ferris wheel rolling toward the sea. (Red)
74. Anal fissures like you wouldn’t believe. (Blue)
75. Anal. (Green)
76. Ancient Athenian boy-fucking. (Blue)
77. André the Giant’s enormous, leathery scrotum. (Red)
78. Angelheaded hipsters burning for the ancient heavenly connection to the starry dynamo in the machinery of the night. (Blue)
79. Antidepressants. (Green)
80. Attention to detail and follow-through. (Green)
81. Bad shrimp for poor people. (Blue)
82. Barely legal boys. (Red)
83. Bathing in moonsblood and dancing around the ancient oak. (Blue)
84. Being a danger to myself and others. (Red)
85. Being a dinosaur. (Red)
86. Being a hideous beast that no one could love. (Red)
87. Being a terrible mother. (Blue)
88. Being awesome at sex. (Red)
89. Being Black. (Red)
90. Being high all the time. (New)
91. Being nine years old. (Blue)
92. Being pleasu(Red) by a thousand tiny Adam Sandlers. (Green)
93. Being sad and horny. (Blue)
94. Being useless. (Red)
95. Being very rich and inc(Red)ibly stupid. (Green)
96. Being white. (Red)
97. Being worshipped as the one true God. (Blue)
98. Beloved television star Bill Cosby. (Blue)
99. Beyoncé. (Green)
100. Big bad mama nipples. (Red)
101. Big Bird’s brown, crusty asshole. (Red)
102. Big, smart money boys tap-tapping on their keyboards. (Green)
103. Bill Clinton, naked on a bearskin rug with a saxophone. (Red)
104. Bitches who knit. (Red)
105. Blackface. (Blue)
106. Blossoming into a beautiful young woman. (Green)
107. Blowing some dudes in an alley. (Red)
108. Blowjobs for everyone. (Blue)
109. Body dysmorphia. (New)
110. Bouncing up and down. (Blue)
111. Breastfeeding a ten-year-old. (Blue)
112. Breastfeeding in public like a radiant Earth goddess. (Green)
113. Brett Kavanaugh. (Green)
114. Brunch. (Green)
115. Bullets. (Blue)
116. Bullshit. (Red)
117. Butt stuff. (Blue)
118. Cancer. (Blue)
119. Centuries of inbreeding. (New)
120. Cheap immigrant labor. (Red)
121. Child Protective Services. (Blue)
122. Childhood obesity. (New)
123. China. (Green)
124. Chipotle. (Green)
125. Chonk in the donk. (New)
126. Clams. (Red)
127. Cock. (Red)
128. Common-sense gun control legislation. (Blue)
129. Comprehensive immigration reform. (Green)
130. Consensual, nonreproductive incest. (Green)
131. Consent. (Red)
132. Consequences. (Green)
133. Continuing to ignore the Uyghurs. (New)
134. Copyright infringement. (New)
135. Crabapples all over the fucking sidewalk. (Red)
136. Crazy anal orgasms. (Green)
137. Creamy slices of real California avocado. (Green)
138. Crippling social anxiety. (Blue)
139. Crushing the patriarchy. (Green)
140. Crying and shitting and eating spaghetti. (Blue)
141. Cumming deep inside my best bro. (Red)
142. Cutting off a flamingo’s legs with garden shears. (Blue)
143. Dad’s funny balls. (Red)
144. Daddy. (Blue)
145. Daddy’s c(Red)it card. (Blue)
146. Deez nuts. (Blue)
147. Dem titties. (Blue)
148. Demonic possession. (Red)
149. Denying the Holocaust. (Green)
150. Destigmatizing sex work. (New)
151. Dis bitch. (Green)
152. Disco fever. (Red)
153. Discovering that what I really want in life is to kill people and have sex with their corpses. (Green)
154. Doing pervert stuff in the shed. (New)
155. Dominating a man by peeing on his eldest son. (Green)
156. Double penetration. (Red)
157. Drinking my bro’s pee-pee right out of his peen. (Red)
158. Drinking responsibly. (Blue)
159. Dropping dead in a Sbarro’s bathroom and not being found for 72 hours. (Green)
160. Dumpster juice. (Green)
161. Dying alone and in pain. (Red)
162. Eating ass. (Green)
163. Eating human flesh. (New)
164. Eating together like a god damn family for once. (Blue)
165. Ejaculating inside another man’s wife. (Blue)
166. Ejaculating live bees and the bees are angry. (Blue)
167. Every man’s ultimate fantasy: a perfectly cylindrical vagina. (Green)
168. Everything. (Green)
169. Existing. (Red)
170. Exploring each other’s buttholes. (Green)
171. Facilitating dialogue and deconstructing binaries. (Green)
172. Farting a huge shit out of my pussy. (Green)
173. Farting all over my face with your tight little asshole. (Green)
174. Feeling the emotion of anger. (Green)
175. Female genital mutilation. (New)
176. Feminism. (Green)
177. Figuring out how to have sex with a dolphin. (Blue)
178. Filling my son with spaghetti. (Red)
179. Film roles for actresses over 40. (Green)
180. Former gifted kids with self-diagnosed ADHD.
181. Four Black guys, four white guys, some laundry, a few pine cones, and a dead camel. (New)
182. Free ice cream, yo. (Blue)
183. Fresh dill from the patio. (Blue)
184. Fucking a corpse back to life. (Blue)
185. Fucking me good and taking me to (Red) Lobster®. (Green)
186. Fucking my therapist. (Green)
187. Gary. (Green)
188. Gary’s thick, uncut hog. (Blue)
189. Gay thoughts. (Green)
190. Gazpacho. (Green)
191. Genghis Khan’s DNA. (Blue)
192. Getting aborted. (Green)
193. Getting down to business to defeat the Huns. (Blue)
194. Getting evicted. (Blue)
195. Getting high with mom. (Green)
196. Getting killed and dragged up a tree by a leopard. (Green)
197. Getting older and uglier. (Red)
198. Getting pegged. (Green)
199. Getting shot by the police. (Blue)
200. Getting the Dorito crumbs out of my pubes. (Green)
201. Getting trapped in a conversation about Ayn Rand. (Green)
202. Getting unfairly canceled just for killing and eating a few children. (New)
203. Going around pulling people’s tampons out. (Green)
204. Going night-night. (Red)
205. Going to a high school reunion on ketamine. (Blue)
206. Going to bed at a reasonable hour. (Green)
207. Gout. (Red)
208. Grandma shakin’ her ass. (Red)
209. Grandpa’s ashes. (Red)
210. Gregor, my largest son. (Green)
211. Gringos. (Blue)
212. Grunting for ten minutes and then peeing sand. (Green)
213. Guns. (Green)
214. Hamas. (New)
215. Happy daddies with happy sandals. (Green)
216. Hating Jews. (Green)
217. Having $57 in the bank. (Red)
218. Having a vagina. (Green)
219. Having been dead the whole time. (New)
220. Having sex on top of a pizza. (Red)
221. Having sex with your mom. (Green)
222. Holding the proper political beliefs of my time to attract a mate. (Green)
223. Hot brown piss. (Red)
224. Hot lettuce. (Green)
225. How awesome it is to be white. (Red)
226. How good lead paint taste. (Green)
227. How great my ass looks in these jeans. (Green)
228. How inconvenient it would be for society if boy cum cu(Red) cancer.
229. How strange it is to be anything at all. (Green)
230. How wet my pussy is. (Red)
231. Huge big balls full of jizz. (Green)
232. Huge tits and a can-do attitude. (Red)
233. Immunity from criminal prosecution. (New)
234. Indescribable loneliness. (Red)
235. Informing you that I am a registe(Red) sex offender. (Green)
236. Injecting speed into one arm and horse tranquilizer into the other. (Blue)
237. Intellectual masturbation. (New)
238. Irrefutable evidence that God is real. (Blue)
239. ISIS. (Green)
240. Israel. (New)
241. It being too late to stop having sex with a horse. (Green)
242. Jafar. (Red)
243. Jeff Bezos. (Green)
244. Jesus. (Red)
245. Jizz. (Blue)
246. Joining the Aryan Brotherhood. (New)
247. Just the tip. (Red)
248. Kim Jong-un. (Red)
249. Late-stage dementia. (Green)
250. Letting everyone down. (Red)
251. Letting out 20 years’ worth of farts. (Blue)
252. Libertarians. (Green)
253. Licking French’s Brown Mustard out of a llama’s asshole. (Red)
254. Like a million alligators. (Blue)
255. Literally eating shit. (Red)
256. Liver failure. (New)
257. Living in a trash can. (Red)
258. Looking all fucked-up from plastic surgery. (New)
259. Looking at my underpants and saying, “oh no.” (New)
260. Lots and lots of abortions. (Blue)
261. Maintaining eye contact with a grown man while he takes a shit. (Red)
262. Making my man squirt. (Red)
263. Making shit up. (Red)
264. Making the penises kiss. (Red)
265. Masturbating in a robe like a rich person. (Red)
266. Math. (Green)
267. Maximizing ROI on supply chain and operations risk management. (Blue)
268. Me. (Red)
269. Medieval Times® Dinner & Tournament. (Red)
270. Mediocrity. (Blue)
271. Melanin. (Green)
272. Menopause. (Green)
273. Mental illness. (Green)
274. Microaggressions. (Green)
275. Misogyny. (Green)
276. Mom. (Red)
277. Mommy and daddy fighting all the time. (Green)
278. Munchin’ puss. (Green)
279. My boyfriend’s stupid penis. (Blue)
280. My dad’s dumb fucking face. (Blue)
281. My dead son’s baseball glove. (Blue)
282. My father, who died when I was seven. (Red)
283. My first period. (Blue)
284. My huge penis and substantial fortune. (Green)
285. My lover’s piss. (Blue)
286. My manservant, Claude. (Red)
287. My mom, WHO IS BEING SUCH A BITCH RIGHT NOW. (Blue)
288. My puffy clit. (Red)
289. My shameful naked body. (Blue)
290. My third husband. (New)
291. My wife spending all my money on bullshit. (New)
292. My worthless son. (Blue)
293. Naughty little boys who need to be punished. (New)
294. Neil Diamond’s Greatest Hits. (Blue)
295. Not believing in giraffes. (Blue)
296. Not contributing to society in any meaningful way. (Red)
297. Not having sex. (Red)
298. Nothing. (Red)
299. Objectifying women. (Green)
300. Old lesbians. (New)
301. Oncoming traffic. (Red)
302. One of them big-city Jew lawyers. (Green)
303. One of those “blow jobs” I’ve been hearing so much about. (Green)
304. One Ring to rule them all. (Red)
305. One thousand Slim Jims. (Red)
306. Our baby. (Green)
307. Overthrowing the democratically-elected government of Chile. (Green)
308. P.F. Chang himself. (Blue)
309. Participating. (Green)
310. Peeing into a girl’s butt to make a baby. (Blue)
311. Playing my asshole like a trumpet. (Green)
312. Plowing that ass like a New England corn farmer. (Green)
313. Political correctness. (Green)
314. Pooping in a leotard and hoping no one notices. (Green)
315. Pooping in the potty. (Green)
316. Prematurely ejaculating like a total loser. (Green)
317. Pretending to be one of the guys but actually being the Spider God. (Green)
318. Prince Ali, fabulous he, Ali Ababwa. (Blue)
319. Profound regret. (New)
320. Pumping out a baby every nine months. (Red)
321. Pussy. (Blue)
322. Putting more Black people in jail. (Green)
323. Quacking like a duck in lieu of a rational argument. (Green)
324. Quiche. (Red)
325. Quinoa. (Green)
326. Racial profiling. (Red)
327. Raising three kids on minimum wage. (Green)
328. Resexualizing formerly desexualized Asian men.
329. Restoring Germany to its former glory. (Green)
330. Reverse cowgirl. (Red)
331. Ripping open a man’s chest and pulling out his still-beating heart. (Red)
332. Rock-hard tits and a huge vagina. (Green)
333. Roland the Farter, flatulist to the king. (Red)
334. Russian super-tuberculosis. (Blue)
335. Salsa Night at Dave’s Cantina. (Green)
336. Samuel L. Jackson. (Red)
337. Santa Claus. (Red)
338. Saying something problematic. (New)
339. Scrotum tickling. (Red)
340. Seeing my village burned and my family slaughtered before my eyes. (Blue)
341. Seeing things from Hitler’s perspective. (Blue)
342. Seizing control of the means of production. (Green)
343. September 11th, 2001. (Blue)
344. Setting my balls on fire and cartwheeling to Ohio. (Blue)
345. Sexual intercourse. (Red)
346. Shaft. (Red)
347. Shitting all over the floor like a bad, bad girl. (Blue)
348. Shitting on my tits. (Green)
349. Showing all the boys my pussy. (Green)
350. Slapping a racist old lady. (Red)
351. Slowly easing down onto a cucumber. (Blue)
352. Sluts. (Blue)
353. Smashing my balls at the moment of climax. (Green)
354. Smoking crack, for instance. (Blue)
355. Sneezing, farting, and cumming at the same time. (Red)
356. Snorting coke off a clown’s boner. (Blue)
357. Some kind of bird-man. (Red)
358. Some of that good dick. (Green)
359. Some really fucked-up shit. (Red)
360. Special musical guest, Lizzo. (Red)
361. Sports. (Blue)
362. Stinking like shit. (Red)
363. Storing a bunch of acorns in my pussy. (Blue)
364. Stuffing a child’s face with Fun Dip® until he starts having fun. (Blue)
365. Stupid. (Blue)
366. Such a big boy. (Blue)
367. Sucking all the milk out of a yak. (Blue)
368. Sudden and unwanted slam poetry. (Green)
369. Sudden Poop Explosion Disease. (Red)
370. Suicidal thoughts. (Red)
371. Suicide bombers. (Red)
372. Supporting small businesses. (New)
373. Survivor’s guilt. (Red)
374. Swedes. (Red)
375. Syphilis. (Red)
376. Systems and policies designed to preserve centuries-old power structures. (Green)
377. Tables. (Green)
378. Taking a man’s eyes and balls out and putting his eyes where his balls go and then his balls in the eye holes. (Red)
379. Tender chunks of all-white-meat chicken. (Green)
380. Texas. (Blue)
381. That ass. (Red)
382. That chicken from Popeyes®. (Green)
383. That photo of Einstein flicking his slutty little tongue. (New)
384. The all-new Nissan Pathfinder with 0.9% APR financing! (Blue)
385. The amount of baby carrots I can fit up my ass. (Green)
386. The amount of gay I am. (Blue)
387. The basic suffering that pervades all of existence. (Blue)
388. The best taquito in the galaxy. (Blue)
389. The body of a 46-year-old man. (Green)
390. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. (Green)
391. The collapse of the Chinese real estate market. (New)
392. The day the birds attacked. (Red)
393. The economy. (Red)
394. The eight gay warlocks who dictate the rules of fashion. (Blue)
395. The eighth graders. (Blue)
396. The euphoric rush of strangling a drifter. (Blue)
397. The feeling of going to McDonald’s as a 6-year-old. (Green)
398. The flute. (Red)
399. The full force of the American military. (Green)
400. The full-blown marginalization of ugly people. (Green)
401. The government. (Green)
402. The graceful path of an autumn leaf as it falls to its earthen cradle. (Green)
403. The hottest MILF in Dallas. (Green)
404. The intoxicating fragrance of my own balls. (New)
405. The jizz-summoning ritual. (New)
406. The kind of family where you get to have sex with each other. (New)
407. The lingering scent of gardenias. (Red)
408. The lived experience of African Americans. (Green)
409. The moist, demanding chasm of his mouth. (Red)
410. The peaceful and non-threatening rise of China. (Blue)
411. The people of Florida. (Red)
412. The police. (Red)
413. The power of the Dark Side. (Blue)
414. The primal, ball-slapping sex your parents are having right now. (Red)
415. The Quesadilla Explosion Salad™ from Chili’s®. (Red)
416. The right amount of cocaine. (Blue)
417. The Rwandan Genocide. (Green)
418. The safe word. (Blue)
419. The size of my penis. (Blue)
420. The sweet song of sword against sword and the braying of mighty war beasts. (Blue)
421. The sweet, forbidden meat of the monkey. (Green)
422. The swim team, all at once. (Blue)
423. The systematic destruction of an entire people and their way of life. (Red)
424. The unbelievable world of mushrooms. (Blue)
425. The white half of Barack Obama. (Blue)
426. The wind. (Green)
427. Three hours of nonstop penetration. (Green)
428. Three or four ladies, rubbing their tits together or something. (Blue)
429. Throwing stones at a man until he dies. (Blue)
430. Tiny, rancid girl farts. (Green)
431. Tongue. (Red)
432. Too much cocaine. (Blue)
433. Trans-exclusionary radical feminists. (Blue)
434. Trees. (Green)
435. Trevor, the world’s greatest boyfriend. (Green)
436. Tripping balls. (Red)
437. Turning 32. (Green)
438. Turning the rivers (Red) with the blood of infidels. (Blue)
439. Twisting my cock and balls into a balloon poodle. (Green)
440. Two beautiful pig sisters. (Green)
441. Two shitty kids and a garbage husband. (Green)
442. Unsheathing my massive horse cock. (Blue)
443. Upgrading to Pornhub Premium. (Blue)
444. Vegetarian options. (Blue)
445. Velcro™. (Red)
446. Verizon customer service. (New)
447. Vietnam flashbacks. (Red)
448. Walking into a glass door. (Blue)
449. Warm, velvety muppet sex. (Red)
450. Watching you die. (Green)
451. Wearing glasses and sounding smart. (Blue)
452. Wearing sweatpants to showcase the penis. (Red)
453. What Jesus would do. (Blue)
454. Whatever you wish, mother. (Blue)
455. When the big truck goes “Toot! Toot!” (Green)
456. Whining like a little bitch. (Red)
457. White culture. (Blue)
458. White people getting offended on behalf of people who aren’t offended.
459. White power. (Red)
460. Who really did 9/11. (Green)
461. Winning first place at the Tallahassee Pig Fucking Tournament. (Red)
462. Work. (New)
463. Yodeling into a pregnant woman’s vagina. (Red)
464. You. (Green)
465. Your dad, who says “hi.” (Red)

When you’re done reading this huge deck of cards, we would love you to check Cards Against Simpsons. 

Other Card List Recommendations

Sure. More Cards Against Humanity is an expansion that brings just enough cards for you to have fun. But, why not check the other packs too? Read our recommendations for card lists and have the best experience ever! 

• Main Game card list;
• The Family Edition card list;
• Glow In The Dark card list
• The Hot Box card list;
• The Everything Box card list;
• The Absurd Box card list;
• The Red Box card list;
• The Blue Box card list;
• The Green Box card list;
• The Dad Pack card list;
• The Geek Pack card list;
• The Sci-fi Pack card list;