Cards Against Humanity Main Game Card List

Nevertheless, you’re all familiar with CAH, a detailed card list doesn’t hurt! The game was first released in 2010 as a Kickstarter, although they say it has been around since 1923, so the 100th Anniversary edition makes sense. The latest version of the main game, 2.4, contains 100 black cards and 500 white cards, and all 600 of them can be read on the card list below. 

Unofficial packs are just as fun too. If you want proof of that, visit EditionCards Online Store.

Cards Against Humanity Black Cards List

1. ______ + ______ = ______.
2. ______ is a slippery slope that leads to ______.
3. ______: kid-tested, mother-approved.
4. ______: Mwah.
5. ______. High five, bro.
6. ★✰✰✰✰ Do NOT go here! Found _____ in my fettuccine alfredo!
7. 50% of all marriages end in ______.
8. A romantic, candlelit dinner would be incomplete without ______.
9. After four platinum albums and three Grammys, it’s time to get back to my roots, to what inspired me to make music in the first place: ______.
10. And the Academy Award for ______ goes to ______.
11. Arby’s: We Have ______.
12. As the mom of five rambunctious boys, I’m no stranger to ______.
13. Brought to you by Bud Light®, the Official Beer of ______.
14. But before I kill you, Mr. Bond, I must show you ______.
15. Check me out, yo! I call this dance move “______.”
16. Coming to Broadway this season, ______: The Musical.
17. Daddy, why is mommy crying?
18. Dear Abby, I’m having some trouble with ______ and would like your advice.
19. Designers! For this week’s challenge, you must make a dress designed for ______.
20. Dude, do not go in that bathroom. There’s ______ in there.
21. Dudes. I just found out that ______ is ______.
22. During sex, I like to think about ______.
23. For my next trick, I will pull ______ out of ______.
24. Fun tip! When your man asks you to go down on him, try surprising him with ______ instead.
25. “Here is the church. Here is the steeple. Open the doors. And there is ______.”
26. Hey guys, welcome to Chili’s! Would you like to start the night off right with ______?
27. Hey Reddit! I’m ______. Ask me anything.
28. Holy shit! My video of ______ has ten million views!
29. How did I lose my virginity?
30. Howdy, neighbor! I couldn’t help but notice you struggling with ______. Need a hand?
31. Hulu’s new reality show features twelve hot singles living with ______.
32. I drink to forget ______.
33. I get by with a little help from ______.
34. I got 99 problems but ______ ain’t one.
35. I never truly understood ______ until I encountered ______.
36. I’m going on a cleanse this week. Nothing but kale juice and ______.
37. I’m Lebron James, and when I’m not slamming dunks, I love ______.
38. I’m no doctor, but I’m pretty sure what you’re suffering from is called “______.”
39. I’m sorry, Professor, but I couldn’t complete my homework because of ______.
40. I’m Tony Robbins, and over the next sixty minutes, I’m going to teach you how to harness the power of ______!
41. If you can’t be with the one you love, love ______.
42. If you like ______, YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK.
43. In the new Disney Channel Original Movie, Hannah Montana struggles with ______ for the first time.
44. Instead of coal, Santa now gives the bad children ______.
45. Introducing the amazing superhero/sidekick duo! It’s ______ and ______!
46. Introducing X-Treme Baseball! It’s like baseball, but with ______!
47. It’s a pity that kids these days are all getting involved with ______.
48. Just once, I’d like to hear you say “Thanks, Mom. Thanks for ______.”
49. Just saw this upsetting video! Please retweet!! #stop______
50. Kids, I don’t need drugs to get high. I’m high on ______.
51. Life for American Indians was forever changed when the White Man introduced them to ______.
52. Lifetime® presents “______: the Story of ______.”
53. Make a haiku.
54. Mamma Mia. Here I go again. My my! How can I resist ______?
55. Maybe she’s born with it. Maybe it’s ______.
56. Mitch McConnell can’t cum without ______.
57. Mr. and Mrs. Diaz, we called you in because we’re concerned about Cynthia. Are you aware that your daughter is ______?
58. My favorite sex position is called “______-style.”
59. My fellow Americans: Before this decade is out, we will have ______ on the moon!
60. My name is Peter Parker. I was bitten by a radioactive spider, and now I’m ______.
61. Next from J.K. Rowling: Harry Potter and the Chamber of ______.
62. Next on ESPN2: The World Series of ______.
63. Old MacDonald had ______. E-I-E-I-O.
64. Premiering tonight: NBC’s new heartfelt drama, This Is ______.
65. “Step 1: ______. Step 2: ______. Step 3: Profit.”
66. That’s right, I killed ______. How, you ask? ______.
67. The class field trip was completely ruined by ______.
68. The new Chevy Tahoe. With the power and space to take ______ everywhere you go.
69. They said we were crazy. They said we couldn’t put ______ inside of ______. They were wrong.
70. “This is the way the world ends. This is the way the world ends. Not with a bang but with ______.”
71. This season at Steppenwolf, Samuel Beckett’s classic existential play: Waiting for ______.
72. Today on Maury: “Help! My son is ______!”
73. TSA guidelines now prohibit ______ on airplanes.
74. Uh, hey guys, I know this was my idea, but I’m having serious doubts about ______.
75. US WEEKLY EXCLUSIVE! Meghan Markle’s Secret Battle With ______!
76. Well if you’ll excuse me, gentlemen, I have a date with ______.
77. What are my parents hiding from me?
78. What ended my last relationship?
79. What gives me uncontrollable gas?
80. What is Kamala Harris’s guilty pleasure?
81. What made my first kiss so awkward?
82. What never fails to liven up the party?
83. What will always get you laid?
84. What would grandma find disturbing, yet oddly charming?
85. What’s a girl’s best friend?
86. What’s my secret power?
87. What’s that smell?
88. What’s that sound?
89. What’s the best metaphor for our political system?
90. What’s the most emo?
91. What’s there a ton of in heaven?
92. When I am a billionare, I shall erect a 50-foot statue to commemorate ______.
93. When I am President, I will create the Department of ______.
94. When I was tripping on acid, ______ turned into ______.
95. White people like ______.
96. Why am I sticky?
97. Why can’t I sleep at night?
98. Why do I hurt all over?
99. Why is Brett so sweaty?
100. Your dreams are one click away! Learn more at ______.com.

While we’re here, do you know that there’s a whole CAH game for your bachelorette party? Check Bachelorettes Against Decency!

Cards Against Humanity White Cards List

1. 50 mg of Zoloft daily.
2. 50,000 volts straight to the nipples.
3. 8 oz. of sweet Mexican black-tar heroin.
4. A ball of earwax, semen, and toenail clippings.
5. A bird that shits human turds.
6. A bitch slap.
7. A bleached asshole.
8. A Bop It™.
9. A bowl of mayonnaise and human teeth.
10. A brain tumor.
11. A certain je ne sais quoi.
12. A cis man playing a trans woman.
13. A crucifixion.
14. A disappointing birthday party.
15. A fart so powerful that it wakes the giants from their thousand-year slumber.
16. A fetus.
17. A fuck-ton of almonds.
18. A gambling problem.
19. A good sniff.
20. A good, strong gorilla.
21. A gossamer stream of jizz that catches the light as it arcs through the morning air.
22. A homoerotic volleyball montage.
23. A horde of Vikings.
24. A lifetime of sadness.
25. A little boy who won’t shut the fuck up about dinosaurs.
26. A live studio audience.
27. A loser like you.
28. A man on the brink of orgasm.
29. A micropenis.
30. A micropig wearing a tiny raincoat and booties.
31. A middle-aged man on roller skates.
32. A mistake.
33. A mopey zoo lion.
34. A much younger woman.
35. A narc.
36. A non-disclosure agreement.
37. A pangender octopus who roams the cosmos in search of love.
38. A positive attitude!
39. A really cool hat.
40. A sad handjob.
41. A salty surprise.
42. A sorry excuse for a father.
43. A stray pube.
44. A Super Soaker™ full of cat pee.
45. A supportive touch on the lower back.
46. A three-way with my wife and Shaquille O’Neal.
47. A time-traveling Chinese general from the Shang Dynasty.
48. A tiny horse.
49. A whole thing of butter.
50. A windmill full of corpses.
51. Academy Award winner Meryl Streep.
52. Accepting the way things are.
53. Active listening.
54. Adderall™.
55. Agriculture.
56. AIDS.
57. Alcoholism.
58. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez.
59. All the dudes I’ve fucked.
60. An abortion.
61. An all-white jury.
62. An AR-15 assault rifle.
63. An endless stream of diarrhea.
64. An erection that lasts longer than four hours.
65. An octopus giving seven handjobs and smoking a cigarette.
66. An Oedipus complex.
67. An old guy who’s almost dead.
68. An older woman who knows her way around the penis.
69. An unwanted pregnancy.
70. Anal beads.
71. Announcing that I am about to cum.
72. Applying topical ointment to my grandfather’s infected penis.
73. Assaulting a police officer.
74. Assless chaps.
75. Aunt Jemima’s® racist pancake sauce.
76. Auschwitz.
77. Authentic Mexican cuisine.
78. Backing over a kid with the Buick.
79. Balls.
80. Bananas.
81. Barack Obama.
82. Barely making $25,000 a year.
83. BATMAN!
84. Battlefield amputations.
85. Becoming a blueberry.
86. Bees?
87. Being a dick to children.
88. Being a motherfucking sorcerer.
89. Being a woman.
90. Being able to talk to elephants.
91. Being fat and stupid.
92. Being fucking pathetic.
93. Being marginalized.
94. Being on fire.
95. Being rich.
96. Bill Nye the Science Guy.
97. Birth control.
98. Bitches.
99. Black Jesus.
100. Black people.
101. Blowing my boyfriend so hard he shits.
102. Boneless buffalo wings.
103. Boogers.
104. Boomers.
105. Boppin’ my flopper.
106. Braiding three penises into a Twizzler.
107. Breaking out into song and dance.
108. Brown people.
109. Bryan Cranston, of all people.
110. Bubble butt bottom boys.
111. Burgers and pussy.
112. Calling the cops on an innocent Black man.
113. Cardi B.
114. Cards Against Humanity.
115. Casually suggesting a threesome.
116. Chainsaws for hands.
117. Clean drinking water.
118. Climbing a telephone pole and becoming one with the T-Mobile network.
119. Cocaine for lunch.
120. Committing suicide.
121. Committing treason.
122. Complaining.
123. Completely unwarranted confidence.
124. Consensual sex.
125. Corporate America.
126. Covering myself with Parmesan cheese and chili flakes because I am pizza.
127. COVID-19.
128. Crab.
129. Cringe.
130. Crippling debt.
131. Critical Race Theory.
132. Crumbs all over the god damn carpet.
133. Cuddling.
134. Cyanide.
135. Da clurb.
136. Daddy issues.
137. Daniel Radcliffe’s delicious asshole.
138. Danny DeVito.
139. Dark and mysterious forces beyond our control.
140. Darth Vader.
141. Dead birds everywhere.
142. Dead parents.
143. Dick fingers.
144. Dick pics.
145. Diversity.
146. Doin’ it in the butt.
147. Doing crimes.
148. Doing drugs with my kids.
149. Doing white people shit with a bunch of white people.
150. Donald J. Trump.
151. Drinking alone.
152. Drinking gasoline to see what it tastes like.
153. Drinking out of the toilet and eating garbage.
154. Dropping a hot doodie out of my turd hole.
155. Drowning the kids in the bathtub.
156. Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson.
157. Dying.
158. Eating a hard-boiled egg out of my husband’s asshole.
159. Emerging from the sea and rampaging through Tokyo.
160. Emotions.
161. Erectile dysfunction.
162. Establishing dominance.
163. Estrogen.
164. Ethnic cleansing.
165. Exactly what you’d expect.
166. Executing a hostage every hour.
167. Explaining how vaginas work.
168. Explaining the difference between sex and gender.
169. Explosions.
170. Extremely tight pants.
171. Fading away into nothingness.
172. Farting and walking away.
173. Feeding strawberries to my manslut.
174. Fellowship in Christ.
175. Fiery poops.
176. Finger painting.
177. Firing a rifle into the air while balls deep in a squealing hog.
178. Flightless birds.
179. Floating down the Hudson River with other garbage.
180. Foreskin.
181. Former President George W. Bush.
182. Fox News.
183. Free samples.
184. Friction.
185. Fucking all my dad’s friends.
186. Fucking my sister.
187. Fucking the weatherman on live television.
188. Full frontal nudity.
189. Gandhi.
190. Gay conversion therapy.
191. Geese.
192. Genuine human connection.
193. German dungeon porn.
194. Getting crushed between Serena Williams’ thighs.
195. Getting crushed by a vending machine.
196. Getting cummed on.
197. Getting decapitated by a helicopter.
198. Getting drugs off the street and into my body.
199. Getting fingered.
200. Getting into a pretty bad car accident.
201. Getting married, having a few kids, buying some stuff, retiring to Florida, and dying.
202. Getting naked and watching Nickelodeon.
203. Getting really high.
204. Getting serial killed.
205. Ghosts.
206. Giggling like an anime girl.
207. Girls.
208. Giving birth in prison.
209. Giving birth to the Antichrist.
210. Gloryholes.
211. Goat.
212. Goblins.
213. God.
214. GoGurt®.
215. Grabbing my man by his love handles and fucking his big ass.
216. Grandma.
217. Half-assed foreplay.
218. Harry Potter erotica.
219. Having a stroke.
220. Having anuses for eyes.
221. Having big dreams but no realistic way to achieve them.
222. Having sex for the first time.
223. Heartwarming orphans.
224. Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II.
225. Heteronormativity.
226. Hobos.
227. Holding a pepper grinder for some reason.
228. Holding down a child and farting all over him.
229. Hope.
230. Horse meat.
231. Hospice care.
232. Hot Asian men.
233. Hot cheese.
234. Hot people.
235. How amazing it is to be on mushrooms.
236. How bad my daughter fucked up her dance recital.
237. How far I can get my own penis up my butt.
238. However much weed $20 can buy.
239. Huffing spray paint.
240. Hurting those closest to me.
241. Illegal immigrants.
242. Inappropriate yodeling.
243. Incest.
244. Inserting a Mason jar into my anus.
245. Invading Poland.
246. Irritable bowel syndrome.
247. Italians.
248. Itchy pussy.
249. J.D. Power and his associates.
250. Jobs.
251. Joe Biden.
252. Judge Judy.
253. Judging everyone.
254. Kamala Harris.
255. Kanye West.
256. Karen.
257. Kayaking with my sluts.
258. Kissing grandma on the forehead and turning off her life support.
259. Lactation.
260. Land mines.
261. Laughing over champagne flutes while the poor freeze to death outside.
262. Laying an egg.
263. Leprosy.
264. Liberals.
265. Licking things to claim them as your own.
266. Like, whatever.
267. Lips that could suck the chrome off of a doorknob.
268. Listening to her problems without trying to solve them.
269. Literally begging to die.
270. Lumberjack fantasies.
271. Lunchables™.
272. Magnets.
273. Man meat.
274. Mansplaining.
275. Many bats.
276. Masturbating.
277. Me jubbly bubblies.
278. Me time.
279. Memes.
280. Men discussing their feelings in an emotionally healthy way.
281. Men.
282. Menstrual rage.
283. Meth.
284. More elephant cock than I bargained for.
285. Mouth herpes.
286. Multiple stab wounds.
287. Murder.
288. My abusive boyfriend who really isn’t so bad once you get to know him.
289. My balls on your face.
290. My Black ass.
291. My boss.
292. My bright pink fuckhole.
293. My cheating son-of-a-bitch husband.
294. My collection of Japanese sex toys.
295. My ex-wife.
296. My fat daughter.
297. My fuckslave, Reginald.
298. My gay best friend.
299. My genitals.
300. My good bra.
301. My horny, horny son.
302. My inner demons.
303. My neck, my back, my pussy, and my crack.
304. My pet scorpion, Tina.
305. My relationship status.
306. My sex life.
307. My Uber driver, Pavel.
308. My ugly face and bad personality.
309. My vagina.
310. My wife having sex with your wife.
311. Nachos for the table.
312. Nasty shit, like real sick stuff.
313. Natural gas.
314. Natural selection.
315. Nazis.
316. NBA superstar LeBron James.
317. Necrophilia.
318. NFTs.
319. Nicolas Cage.
320. Nipple blades.
321. Nobody giving a shit about anything anymore.
322. Not reciprocating oral sex.
323. Not vaccinating my children because I am stupid.
324. Not wearing pants.
325. Object permanence.
326. Old-people smell.
327. One titty hanging out.
328. One trillion dollars.
329. Only dating Asian women.
330. Opposable thumbs.
331. Oprah.
332. Our dildo.
333. Over 10,000 Guatamalan migrants.
334. Owning and operating a Chili’s franchise.
335. Pac-Man uncontrollably guzzling cum.
336. Pedophiles.
337. Peeing a little bit.
338. Penis breath.
339. Penis envy.
340. Permanent Orgasm-Face Disorder.
341. Pictures of boobs.
342. Pissing in my thirsty mouth.
343. Pixelated bukkake.
344. Police brutality.
345. Pooping back and forth. Forever.
346. Pooping in a laptop and closing it.
347. Poor life choices.
348. Poor people.
349. Poverty.
350. Powerful thighs.
351. Prescription pain killers.
352. Preteens.
353. Pretending to be a dentist.
354. Pretending to care.
355. Pro-life protesters.
356. Prostate stimulation.
357. PTSD.
358. Puberty.
359. Pulling out.
360. Peeing a little bit.
361. Punching a congressman in the face.
362. Puppies!
363. Putting children in cages.
364. Putting things where they go.
365. Queefing.
366. Racially-biased SAT questions.
367. Racism.
368. Rectangles.
369. Republicans.
370. Ronald Reagan.
371. Running out of semen.
372. Salvation.
373. Saudi oil money.
374. Saying “I love you.”
375. Saying everything is ok when everything is clearly not okay.
376. Science.
377. Seeing Grandma naked.
378. Seeing my father cry.
379. Seeing what happens when you lock people in a room with hungry seagulls.
380. Seething with quiet resentment.
381. Self-loathing.
382. Selling crack to children.
383. Seven dead and three in critical condition.
384. Sex with animals.
385. Sexually active band geeks.
386. Shame.
387. Shutting up so I can watch the game.
388. Sideboob.
389. Silence.
390. Sipping kombucha like a smug piece of shit.
391. Sitting on my face and telling me I’m garbage.
392. Slaughtering innocent civilians.
393. Smallpox blankets.
394. Smegma.
395. Smelling of cum.
396. Sniffing and kissing my feet.
397. Soft, kissy missionary sex.
398. Solving problems with violence.
399. Some bitch who loves pineapple.
400. Some god damn peace and quiet.
401. Some guy.
402. Some punk kid who stole my turkey sandwich.
403. Soup that is too hot.
404. Spaghetti? Again?
405. Sperm whales.
406. Spirit Airlines.
407. Squirting.
408. Stalin.
409. Still being a virgin.
410. Strong female characters.
411. Stuffing my peehole with Tic-Tacs,
412. Sunshine and rainbows.
413. Swamp ass.
414. Switching to Geico®.
415. Swooping.
416. Tearing that ass up like wrapping paper on Christmas morning.
417. Telling a shitty story that goes nowhere.
418. Tentacle porn.
419. The American Dream.
420. The Amish.
421. The arrival of the pizza.
422. The Bachelorette season finale.
423. The Big Bang.
424. The Blood of Christ.
425. The bombing of Nagasaki.
426. The clitoris.
427. The Confederate flag.
428. The cool, refreshing taste of Pepsi®.
429. The death penalty.
430. The Devil Himself.
431. The entire Mormon Tabernacle Choir.
432. The female orgasm.
433. The gays.
434. The glass ceiling.
435. The Great Depression.
436. The Hamburglar.
437. The heart of a child.
438. The Holy Bible.
439. The illusion of choice in a late-stage capitalist society.
440. The Jews.
441. The KKK.
442. The Kool-Aid Man.
443. The magic of live theatre.
444. The milkman.
445. The miracle of childbirth.
446. The only gay person in a hundred miles.
447. The opioid epidemic.
448. The past.
449. The Patriarchy.
450. The placenta.
451. The Pope.
452. The rhythms of Africa.
453. The Russians.
454. The screams…the terrible screams.
455. The South.
456. The tampon from my vagina.
457. The Three-Fifths Compromise.
458. The true meaning of Christmas.
459. The ugliest boy in town,
460. The Underground Railroad.
461. The violation of our most basic human rights.
462. The Wendy’s Spicy Chicken Sandwich.
463. The whole enchilada.
464. The wifi password.
465. Therapy.
466. These hoes.
467. This month’s mass shooting.
468. Three dicks at the same time.
469. Three ounces of clean urine.
470. Throwing a virgin into a volcano.
471. Throwing grapes at a man until he loses touch with reality.
472. Tiny tits that say “Yippee!” when you touch them.
473. Touching a pug right on his penis.
474. Toxic masculinity
475. Two Xanax and a bottle of wine.
476. Using a condom.
477. Using comedy as a coping mechanism.
478. Vehicular manslaughter.
479. Viagra®.
480. Vigorous jazz hands.
481. Vladimir Putin.
482. Vomiting seafood and bleeding anally.
483. Waiting till marriage.
484. Waking up half-naked in a Denny’s parking lot.
485. Website.
486. Wet dreams.
487. What that mouth do.
488. Whatever’s in the fridge.
489. White people.
490. White privilege.
491. Wizard music.
492. Women in yogurt commercials.
493. Women of color.
494. Women’s suffrage.
495. Wondering if it’s possible to get some of that salsa to go.
496. Working in an Amazon warehouse.
497. Worshipping that pussy.
498. Yeast.
499. Your mom.
500. Your weird brother.

Other Card List Recommendations

The main game is indeed the most important, but that didn’t stop us from making other card lists. Below, you’ll find our card list recommendations, including Cards Against Humanity expansions and more:

• The Family Edition card list;
• Glow In The Dark card list
• The Hot Box card list;
• The Everything Box card list;
• The Absurd Box card list;
• The Red Box card list;
• The Blue Box card list;
• The Green Box card list;
• The Dad Pack card list;
• The Geek Pack card list;
• The Sci-fi Pack card list;